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February 15, 2006

Synthetic Creatures

Synthetic CreatureMaterialPersonality Nature of BirthDate
TalosBronzeAggressive Fashioned by HephaestusLike, 5,000 BC
Galatea (Pygmalion) Stone Not much Aphrodite Intervention ""
Golem Clay Creepy, vengful Rabbis & God 1579-ish
Gingerbread Man Dough Rascally, with hubris ??? ???
Frankenstein's Monster Dead people Vengeful Science 1816
Tin Man, Scarecrow Straw, Tin Kind Witches 1900
Tik Tok Metal Stalwart Witches again? 1914
Pinocchio Wood Impish Fairy Intervention 1914
Marius, Sulla, Radius, Damon, et al. * Metal Hard-working Science 1921
The Robot from Fritz Lang's Metropolis Metal Not much Science 1927
Loads of B-Movie robots Metal Sometimes good, usually badScience 1950s - 1960s
$6-million Man Dead Steve Austin + 'Bionics' Good guy Science 1974
See-Threepio (C3PO) Metal Gay Science 1977
Terminator Metal Jerk Science 1984

From these data we can conclude that creating synthetic creatures from organic materials result in more interesting personalities than we would get from inorganic ones. Stone in particular yields sexy yet uninteresting girlfriends.

Synthetic creatures made from wood or plants tend to be spunky, while those made of rock or metal are true literalists, in that they adhere to Literalism.

Based on this theory, we can posit that an artificial man made of twine would be witty and urbane, at least in comparison to his metallic brethren.

We can also conclude that Science-generated creatures are in general scarier (or at least more powerful) than God-generated ones, especially when portrayed by Lee Majors.

Thirdly, female robots are boring.

It was really in the 20th century when the line between robotics and medicine began to blur, when it was possible to imagine a human being with mostly mechanical organs and limbs. But, if you include Voodoo dolls in this list,
well then...
I'm not sure, but it's related.

* The first use of the word 'robot' is from this play: R.U.R. (ROSSUM'S UNIVERSAL ROBOTS)

Posted by mslaybau at February 15, 2006 10:09 PM

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